I have just given Maresia away... to that lady from the Emerens` old building.... I am so sad... my heart is hurting so much... it is very difficult to stand. I hate myself! I am avoiding human contact for so long and I just let my little friend, who was there for me all the time, down. Who has been so cruel putting me in so many hard situations!?
I cannot stop crying. I tried to find one person to talk about this... but could not my mother... my sister... and even Emilia... nobody was there... Steffie also dido not answer the phone. I feel so terrible... I feel like I am a monster. WHY DID I HAVE TO BE A MONSTER WITH MY LITTLE CAT!!?? This is extremely painful...
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